Does anyone else have a child who freaks out over fuzz balls and strings? I mean, really freaks out. It's like my littlest thinks they are attacking her. She's worse that I am about spiders (and if you know me, that's BAD).
Let's not mention what happens with food that turns stringy...
It reminds me of how I react sometimes, especially when I look back on my day/week/month and think "Epic Fail."
For example: Homeschooling from November through the start of January...
I had planned to do simple review games of the concepts we worked on earlier, so she could have fun and still learn. Structured time to do the fun and creative stuff I don't normally fit into my schedule.
Instead... Let's just say that my children learned a lot about what foods are easier on the stomach and just how often you can visit the doctor and clean out the car seats... among other things. We had 6(?) doctors visits in that time frame due to fevers and whatnots.
Epic fail, right?
--- side note: if my children were not socialized, they would not have kept catching the illnesses they had... but I digress... ---
*sigh*
We had a lot of snuggle time, and since I'm not big on TV/Movies, we did a lot of reading together.
We read through an advent calendar of scriptures I created, and so many of their books. We even finished a few simple chapter books.
Did her academics completely disappear? No, we had a few good days in there where we did review phonics and CC memory work, but overall we kinda just rode the waves of uncertainty when you keep passing illnesses around the family.
While I felt like I was falling way behind in the school aspect of life, I was grateful. Grateful that, as a homeschooling mom, I have the freedom to take a few days (or weeks) easy and not worry that she is going to fall behind.
If she missed school - public or private - as often as we had sick days, she would have fallen very far behind and we both would have been stressed trying to catch her up. With how things worked, we learned in more relaxing ways (board games and stories) when we could, and I know she will be fine when it comes to everything else.
So really, was it an epic fail? Did I fail my child when we "took time off" from memory work and math worksheets?
No.
I taught my children the depth of my care for them. I loved on them, did special things with their meals and our family time. I taught my older one (only 5) how to take her time when she was sick and not rush - and she turned around when her little sis got sick and helped her slow down and take time to heal.
My love is a reflection of God's love for them. We prayed for other people, even when we were sick. Yes, they prayed for themselves too, but I got to teach a real life lesson that even as we aren't always healthy and happy, others struggle too and need prayer.
Those are lessons that apply directly to life. As important as math, science, history, etc are, teaching my children that they are loved and can share love with others - that is more important.
So when I'm tempted to freak out about the fuzz balls distracting my days, or whine about the strings that get pulled and unravel all I've been working towards...
I am reminded that I am blessed. Blessed to be able to choose homeschool, To choose what lessons my children learn. Blessed to be able to fill their hearts with genuine love so they will have the strength to go out and love on others.
Ephesians 6:12 says
"For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places."
Sometimes those spiritual battles come in a physical manner.
When you are fighting illnesses, big or small, when things just don't seem to be working out right, it is so easy to give in to the feeling of failure. Throwing up your hands and saying "I give up!"
We really need to be saying "I give it to You, Lord!"
Honestly, I have a hard time with that sometimes. I feel like I should have it all together. After all, I'm Mommy so I know exactly what my children need. I'm a wife of over a decade, surely I can take care of my husband. I'm home all day, the house should be orderly and tidy. I'm a former school teacher, education comes as easy as breathing....
We have expectations of ourselves, and we work hard at living up to them.
Yet Christ said "seek ye first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you." (Matthew 6:33)
Following HIS will, HIS plan.
Galatians 5:14
For the law is fulfilled in one word, even this: Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.
How does that tie in? I want my children to love others, love them as much as they are loved. It's easier to love yourself when you are loved. I love my children, and am capable of loving them because God loves me and informs me that I am lovable.
So, even when they don't learn math, science, whatever, if they learn the love of Christ and how to share that love, I have not failed.
